When did you know you were gay

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What was I meant to do, or act like? That I’m left-handed? I had already been asked a million times, "When did you know you were gay", but I was thrilled to have someone state the question aloud, in the context of an academic exercise. I first defined my bisexuality in the course of the first 2 months since realising I liked her.

Or bisexual.

I fell in love with her that day, but never saw her again after that.”

When did you first know you were queer?

Let us know in the comments or on our Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theselfpluscollective/

Matt’s Substack

Coming out late is like being born halfway through your life.

Am I bi? I hadn’t conceived of straight-identified people being asked to state their sexual orientation, then understand it well enough to present it—to come out—to a room full of strangers.

Of course, each of the queer kids had a story—typically many stories—about first crushes, gender identity, sideways haircuts, and sexual awakenings.

I was riveted by the idea of an expertly curated reading list. A very big grin, actually.

That’s when I knew I for sure.

At the end of the week there was a catwalk where we would showcase our self made garments. The clues were there… I just had to be driven to see them.

And that’s just my journey. We all have our own twists and turns in coming to terms with our queerness and starting to explore it.

I was also totally amazed by the fact that non-queer-identified students were being asked to recall their sexual awakenings, too. Or a leaf blower.”

To him, it was just that simple. One of the girls I was there with was walking on this catwalk and thats when I started feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. And that sent me down the panic spiral of: am I queer?

My very first women’s studies class: a clause so momentous, it requires no verb.

The course title was actually Women’s Studies 101. See what’s inside.

Then he hit me with…

“What makes your d*** hard? I couldn’t afford a lisp, and I was fresh out of scarves and plaid pants. It was a thrill to witness living humans discussing all of this.

I remember walking into the classroom on the first day and sitting in the center of the front row.

He spoke with great eloquence about topics I had never heard a person speak aloud about. I arrived without the slightest clue about what to expect, which did nothing to counter my lifetime’s worth of expectations. Am I gay? And a baby needs their mama, so that makes sense.

I needed a scalpel. Here is what other people within our community have to say about when they first knew they were queer:

“I watched 'The Rocky Horror Picture Show' and that changed something in me.

Several months later, I spoke my first word.
“Dissect.”
Most people’s first word is, “Mama” or “Da.” I think first words come from a need. He wanted to know the moment when the realization of our sexuality descended upon us.